It’s summer. It’s hot. We’re indoors and feeling a bit holed-up. My dad just showed up to see if he can fix my evaporative cooler.  Bear has just shot out the door right behind him.

I really don’t know what to say today, without whining, except that (unlike his olive-skinned mother) my son really can’t go long without sunscreen. Yes, that was a very random comment, but finding this picture of his white on rice little body, buried in my documents folder, brings sunscreen to mind.

My mother totally flips out if I forget Bear’s sunscreen.  Why do moms continue to be moms when they should give it a rest and enjoy themselves after a job well-done – sorta like smokin a big fat cigar after dinner?

Am I destined to worry about this human being and his offspring for the rest of my life? (Big heavy sigh)

oh my heart.

(I whined again. I’m finished for today)

Ok, so soon I’ll stop posting about this, but Jon and Kate is a show that my son and I watch together (besides Sponge Bob).

Kate Gosselin, the single mom, is so freakin interesting to me now. Because for so long I didn’t relate. I was infatuated with Jon and Kate and their ability to do it… period. I just watched another episode and I can understand Kate now. I get how she said that she “fixed a screen” for the first time…or that she is willing to try anything she hasn’t done before (like camping out) for her kids. There is something empowering about being a single parent. She gets it now and I think that millions of viewers will get it too.

Ok, the end. …..for now.

Irrevocably and with a slight twitch in my left eye, I changed the name of my blog from Momma Pie to ,along with my website, You and Me Kid. It wasn’t easy. Last year I “deeply” pondered the title for my “newer” blog for days and days…okay, so maybe it was hours and hours.

I then became interested in other mom bloggers after getting back into the swing of mine again and in the midst of my blogging addiction I stumbled on a horrifying site (no pun intended).

It seems there is an awesome blog with a very similar name – Mommy Pie.

To top it off the author of Mommy Pie is……(drumroll)….(cymbal crash)… a single mom! Synchronicity? Bullpocky?

At first I thought to myself  -Bah! I can keep this name and it won’t matter a diddly squat.  Then I kept reading. Turns out  she’s  a great writer and active in publishing (gets lots of press too).

All I have to say is this- Thank god I ditched that Go Daddy cart 3 times with Mommapie.com in it!

And for my seven wonderful subscribers…I’ll get to that title change soon on Feedburner.  Gotta take my kid to the doctor…

Di-sci-pline

Pronunciation:

\ˈdi-sə-plən\

Function:

noun

What does that word conjure up in your head as a single parent? I’ve been feeling that I’ve lost control of my kid lately. The funny thing is, it finally hit home when I went to put my dog Jade in her pen for the evening last night and she disobeyed me. This is the first time ever that she has not gone in

My two little brats

her pen when told.  I have been giving my dog treats too often and my son too many popsicles. It seems as though good cop has been ruler in the past weeks and I’ve been taken less seriously. Being good cop all the time takes the edge off temporarily, but the long term effects aren’t worth it.

This morning, in what seemed like an easy-going morning, got ugly pretty fast. I had to put my son  in time out.  I’ve noticed as he gets older,  as the physical game lessens (getting up every hour, chasing after him, picking him up etc.)the mental game gets more difficult. He has learned how mom ticks. This is not so fun for mom. It has also enlightened mom to a few unsavory aspects of myself. I’m even more flawed then I originally came to accept! How can this be?

Only now am I discovering the ugly fact that I have to be good cop and bad cop at the same time. If I was schizophrenic, then this role might be sorta cool to play.  Alas, though some may attest to a few of my psychotic episodes, I am not schizo, at least not yet! ….Read more →

I am grateful for this lovely spot I get to live in

Update to my last post…I’m back to square one! I wasn’t very successful at being positive the other day. Thanks to a kind reader named Liz, I will now restart a gratitude journal. I learned about gratitude journaling from a book titled “Simple Abundance“.  It basically says to

• buy a small notebook
• write down five things every night before retiring for bed or first thing in the morning, that you are grateful for
• although it’s sometimes  hard to find things to write when you are feeling down, find simple things like “I am thankful for the beautiful starts this evening”. Or like Liz mentioned ” this coffee tastes sooooo good”.

This really does help. Thanks Liz for bringing it into my consciousness again.  I am grateful for that! I hope you will give it a try. It’s good for the soul.

The law of attraction rules in my world. I thoroughly believe that we get back what we put out there – in thought, in words, in actions. I should get ready for a shit storm, if I don’t stop it.  I seem to have been caught up in negativity lately and I was so tired of it, like, last month. I am going to have to put an end to it myself.

Negativity is surrounding me at the moment. Or was. When I start bitching, some friends or clients will say -”well, you are a single parent, it must be very difficult”. Being a single mother is hard I suppose, but it’s all I know. It’s NOT just me that’s bitchy! It’s everyone! Maybe it’s the economy, or California’s budget crisis, or my credit card bills , or Jon and Kate plus 8 splitting up.  I’m kidding about Jon and Kate….I think.  It’s also been 100 plus degrees here for over two weeks, so I think people are grumpy. The minute they walk into the salon I see it on their faces. The walk from the car to the salon door is like being rolled through the broiler at Burger King. Instead of trying to make them feel better, I get irritated that they are irritated. This technique doesn’t work so much. ….Read more →

I am the parent sitting next to you at Red Robin, whispering threats under her breath to her lovely child sitting next to her. Threats that go like – “If you don’t behave and eat your lunch, we are NOT going into the mall…’ or “I am sick of you acting like this. You’re acting like a brat”- (as child continues to be defiant I keep threatening and retorting with same childlike ugliness, instead of just picking up and going home). Mind you, I’ve just drove an hour to get to the mall. I actually hate malls, but I wanted my son to experience it…why? I have no idea. This voice emanating from me is not me. Where is it coming from?My parents have jumped inside of my body and taken over. It’s weird. One  NEVER EVER expects to do that same things one’s parents did – oaths were sworn that it would never happen.

My Zen-Mother friend, that I’ve had since childhood, described another friend of mine from childhood as a “screamer”. She yells at her kids a lot. I do remember her mother yelling at her and her sisters as a child.  Now, that my son is 3 1/2 I have found myself yelling at him on occasion. “Pick up your toys! We just cleaned your room!”, or “You WILL eat your vegetables!”.  I wouldn’t describe it as top of the lungs screaming, but it’s an angry voice. This is not something I find myself proud of, nor do I justify it.  Overcoming this compulsory act is a work in progress and also a spiritual one at that.

Today Bear and I had a difference in opinion. He didn’t want to eat his lunch – he wanted to play in the mall. As soon as I got irritated and angry with him I regretted it. He is a child – I, supposedly, am not. It is my job to be patient, understanding and a teacher. It is not my job to be the bully, although it works sometimes.  Today was a challenge and a lesson. Mostly, for me. Oh wise Zen Mother show me the way!

Oh how I yearn to be a Zen Mother-blowing off my child’s nasty behavior and gliding through the mall without wanting to scream as he is behaving  like a spoiled brat. To tread lightly to the car and head back home, holding my ground with steadfastness, while understanding that he is not perfect and WILL act up and that this is life. To accept this fact and handle it with patience and wisdom is something I yearn for. I guess wisdom is learned and so I cannot be “wise” just by being a mother.  Instead I sound like my mother or father for that matter.  A lesson was learned today, but I honestly wish sometimes I could rewind my voice and erase it.

Okay, so I loved Jon and Kate and admired them for the way they could do what they do with all those kids, and the love they shared…then, after the breakup, I didn’t want to watch anymore. I was thinking – “who else is gonna watch?”

No one wants to watch a single mom to eight kids…do they? Octomom’s show hasn’t come to fruition yet. (not that I was waiting for that one). I figure the TLC network would drop Jon and Kate altogether.

Well, now that I know Jon is probably going through some sort of mid-life…well…I dunno…whatever, but the idea of getting to watch Kate Gosselin as a single mom in a reality show is suddenly appealing to me . Yeah, unlike THIS single parent, she has nannies, goes on fabulous vacations and gets to work out, but this should get interesting in more ways than the obvious!

I watched and loved a dating reality show about Single Mom’s called “Must Love Kids”, but the network changed it’s time to some weird spot, so I took it that they felt their weren’t enough viewers. They need to realize that single parents are growing in numbers – unfortunately. But, maybe they will soon understand that they have an audience and a market.

It would be better if they weren’t in the public eye and on tv, but I don’t foresee the family giving up their income. I’m sorry to say it but ” Welcome to my world Kate Gosselin!”…and only my best wishes go out to their children – that they may not be hurt too deeply by this time in their life.

It’s  going to be stinkin hot here today . I want to leave, just for the day and cool off.  One day! Unfortunately the wonderful economy is leaving us to swelter.

Bear spent the other day outside. We raced his toy cars up and down the driveway. It was fun and it was free…Jade the dog even enjoyed herself.

G-Force just came to town in 3d.  It’s a story about guinea pigs who are secret government agents.

Hmmmmm…I’d wait for the DVD….oops, I almost said “video” (showing my age).  My kid is three. He watched the entire thing. I wanted to leave first for once.  Sort of over the top car wreck violent for a three year old and lots of poop jokes. The kids in the theater laughed hysterically -  I guess I am more mature than I thought, cause I didn’t laugh…except once. I think he was a bit young, and yes, it WAS rated PG. These days, as a single mom, I take any opportunity get OUT of the house and go to the movies.